I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
Randomize
