so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
Last night, my friend changed all my contacts in my phone. I have been texted by Batman, Donatello, and Hermione Granger. I have no idea who they are, and it doesn't upset me at all.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
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