NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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