Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
Randomize
