I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Randomize
