It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
Randomize