I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
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