Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
Well guess who isn't a virgin anymore
guess who isnt wearing pants has a shaving cream beard and is afraid theres no cream cheese in the fridge
the answer to that last one was me. the answer to the first one is you, you sly dog
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
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