I wish I could be a nicer person. Or a more sober one.
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
Randomize
