Porn is love you can see.
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
She said she liked strap-ons.
SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT SHOES, YOU ASSHOLE! YOU'RE THE WORST WINGMAN EVER!
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
I'm sobbing to NWA
Randomize
