I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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