Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
No more Irish car bombs ever.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
Woke up with chlamydia and a bruised rib. I'd say my boss is gonna be mad about me not showing up to work, except you know.. it's her fault.
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
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