How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
Randomize
