I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
Randomize
