was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
you know whats weird about having a girlfriend....I look forward to masturbating now....sort of like quality me time.
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
I just found a voice recording from Tanya's bachelorette party when we found you drunk in downtown being harassed by a crazy dude dressed like a clown and we rescued you. Attached is a voice recording of me interviewing you after we found you. I titled it Carlos Batman.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
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