oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
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