The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
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