sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
