shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
So I just went to clothing optional bar
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
Randomize