You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
You took all of my sister's dolls and threw them out the window and then you started talking to her etcha sketch and mr. potato head. I later found you passed out in front of Toy Story and it all made sense.
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
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