Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
I just woke up in the back of his van. Bring me a sunkist.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
my nose is crying tears of wow.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
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