Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
Let's get the cat blown out
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
Randomize
