girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
