you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
Omg I joined a choir last night...
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