whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
why does every cop we meet know your name?
Randomize
