its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
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