why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
If I ever write a book, i'm calling it "why do i work with fucktards?"
It'll be a good sequel to my other book, "why do i sleep with fucktards?"
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
Randomize
