i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
I've been at work for less than an hour and have pooped twice already. That's what happens when you start sleeping with your roommate and don't want to use the bathroom at home anymore.
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Randomize
