Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
Hey remember that thing i said about never apologizing for being a hot mess? Well that was before you found me drunk in the hallway with no pants.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
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