Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
Randomize
