Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Randomize
