You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
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