Kiss
Puke
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
Randomize
