Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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