i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
Got home from the bar at 4am. 100% sober, unlaid. Epic fail or responsible behavior?
Responsible fail?
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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