i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
The dog destroyed my vibrator and swallowed several pieces. Vet gave us a laxative so now I’m checking lots of dog shit and having no orgasms. Plus the cute vet knows I don’t get enough dick, so that’s just great
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
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