This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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