Yo dont text me then not text me
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
Dude, you need to come and get her. She's sitting on the bathroom floor making hearts with her menstrual blood. And remind me never to let her do jello shots again
Randomize
