I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
Randomize
