belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
I just realized I had sex more when i looked like a fat elton john. Fuck my life.
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
Randomize
