Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
Randomize
