and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
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