Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
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