Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
Like he's moved to LinkedIn creeping on me since he's blocked everywhere else & I'm just so confused does he think I'm going to post daily updates of my life on FUCKING LINKEDIN
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
Randomize
