There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
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