If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Randomize
