She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
Tonight was fucked up. First my mom called me and told me I had to go to the bar to pick up my dad 'cause he was drunk. Then when I got there my dad was doing a body shot from this lady who happened to be my 1st grade teacher. By far the most awkward car ride home. Idk if I should tell my mom or not.
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
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