Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
I’m at the Eye doc, sitting in the waiting room. The woman next to me is highlighting passages in her bible. I’m watching pornhub on mute. I clearly need some penis, or Jesus.
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
Randomize
