i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
Randomize
