We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
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