Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
MY TWIN SISTER IS ENGAGED. I REPEAT, MY SCREW UP OF A SISTER IS ENGAGED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'll be there in 20 with vodka.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
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